Reset

I don’t think it’s any real secret here that 2012 was not my year for a variety of reasons that I’m not going to delve into again. And as such, I’ve been awaiting its end with great anticipation for months now, and definitely breathed a huge sigh of relief when the clock finally struck midnight on Monday. Part of me laughs at the idea of New Year’s Eve celebrations and resolutions and whatnot, because as pretentious as it sounds, time really is just a concept created by humans. It’s not real. We shouldn’t place so much emphasis on the difference between December 31 and January 1, because the only differences are the ones we construct and perceive (or think we construct and perceive).

But none of that rationalist bullshit mattered to me this year, because I was fully vested in the idea that “2012 sucked so 2013 will be better because it just has to be”.  So I woke up on Tuesday morning and in my sleep-deprived, slightly-hungover stupor immediately started making Hoppin John with all the eager hopefulness and optimism of a religious fanatic throwing money into the tithing bowl. Because despite that I don’t believe in superstition, traditions are fun and I’m just not taking any chances either way. And also, Hoppin John is delicious (and a pretty good hangover meal).

 (I was going to say excuse the blurry iPhone photo, but most of my regular photos are of equal poor quality)

After breakfast, Jordan and I set out to go kayaking, as we had made plans to get up early for an epic day on the river, starting the new year off on the right foot and scoffing at the rest of the world who would inevitably choose to languish in bed on National Hangover Day. I’m always so turned off by “obligatory partying” like birthdays and New Year’s and the Fourth of July and whatnot, so I had zero expectations for Monday night and just wanted a relaxed evening hanging out with whoever wanted to come over, make some homemade pizzas, drink some champagne, and sit by the fire just late enough to ring in the new year before going to bed.

But joke’s on me because I was too busy throwing bottle rockets into a fire at 2 a.m. to remember my well laid plans, and as such we got a pretty late start to the day.. But we didn’t give up, and that’s what’s important, right? Right.

Hey, buddy!

 

 Dream house. It's good to have goals. 

 

Winter colors of Florida. Not too shabby.

 

 

What I see when I dream of Florida. 

Well, this and live oak hammocks. And mangrove lagoons. And cypress swamps. And everything else but strip malls and high rises.

I wasn’t sure if this popular river would be dead on New Year’s Day or teeming with all the other people who had the day off work and wanted to take advantage of the nice, warm weather. I’d say it was closer to the latter, and I definitely saw more people than I ideally like to see when I play outside (which is of course zero), but it didn’t ruin my good time. I had such a wonderful, albeit short, day playing outside with the renewed calm contentment of someone who has felt a great hypothetical weight lifted from her shoulders.
 

I think Jordan had fun, too.

I honestly do feel that this year will be better than the last, not because I blindly believe that that’s just how the universe works, but because I’ve been thinking so much about the ups and downs of the past year and how and what I need to do to make this year different. Not everything that happened in 2012 was my own fault (I’m pretty sure I didn’t give my beloved dog cancer), but a lot of it was, and I’m finally ready to take responsibility and not make the same mistakes again. Time may be a concept and change may only be what we create and perceive, but those are still quite powerful notions, and I’m happy for the chance to hit the proverbial reset button and start anew.

Here’s to wishing all of you a healthy, happy, prosperous 2013!